Thursday, 13 October 2016

Purpose....Where To Find It?



Purpose....'an aim or meaning in your life because there is something that you want to achieve.'

This word 'purpose' is something that I have thought a lot about, and especially over the past year.
I'm guessing that I am probably not the only one too.
Life is a strange old thing and there have been numerous times where it has stopped me in my tracks and made me question everything. What is the meaning of it? Why am I here? What is my purpose?

I believe that we would all love our jobs and be much happier in general if we felt as though we were fulfilling a purpose. I know that this is definitely true for myself.
We spend such a huge chunk of our lives working, it's almost quite scary, so surely it's common sense that we are happy whilst doing so.

I have always been a believer in this mantra, but even more so since I lost my mum. I think sometimes when individuals have gone through a life changing event, it really makes you look at your life and re-assess everything. It makes you realise that we aren't invincible and that life is short. You only get one chance at this, so what's to lose? Now I am aware that I am sounding super cheesy here, however it really is true.

Throughout my mum's illness my purpose was to look after her. I luckily was self-employed and only working part time, but this was my choice. Our decisions and plans were all based around her appointments and how she was feeling. This was our life for 2 and a half years. So when she passed I felt completely and utterly lost. My purpose was gone and I did not know what to do with myself.
Being able to make my own decisions was weird and I almost didn't like it. I had grown accustomed to having my life dictated for me and I now I was unable to function.
That's a strange thing to hear from a 26 year old perhaps, but I felt as though I needed to re-think my life and what I wanted.

I adore being a hair and makeup artist and always loved the work, however it suddenly didn't feel enough for me. I needed more on top of this and I needed to do something to help others and make a difference.
Planning my mum's funeral felt like a blur but it did make me ask myself a question....How do I want to be remembered?
I think that this is a powerful question and one that I recommend anyone taking some time to answer. My mum was an incredible teacher and so much so that lots of her students were still in touch with her. I'm talking children who she taught when they were 6 years old and now were in their 30's. She made a big impact on their lives and I was inundated with wonderful messages from them and their families when it happened. This, to me, was amazing. She really found her purpose and her calling and it was never forgotten.

Now this is something that I am working on for myself. I want to enjoy each day, I want to feel like I am making a difference and not just working each day purely to pay the bills.
There is so much in the world to be enjoyed and I refuse to just let it pass me by.
Of course, I won't feel this way everyday and that's ok. But I am on a journey to find my next purpose and fill my life with satisfaction.
For anyone that knows me you will know that I am currently in the process of starting my own business and creating my own beauty brand. This is something that I never thought I would ever do, even the word business used to freak me out. However this now feels right for me and makes me feel comfortable in a strange way. I feel as though I need to use my experience with cancer and losing my mum to do good. I do not want to have been put through everything to just ignore it and forget it. I have knowledge and I want to use it.

Perhaps we can all use our experiences..good or bad...to find our purpose?

I will keep you updated along the way.


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